


Loyalty

by carrowfly



Series: Ride or Die [3]
Category: How to Get Away with Murder
Genre: F/F, Symbiotic Relationship, Toxic Relationship
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-11-03
Updated: 2018-11-03
Packaged: 2019-08-16 21:07:16
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,752
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16502723
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/carrowfly/pseuds/carrowfly
Summary: Three times Bonnie's loyalty was tested.Set throughout the show.





	Loyalty

"I wish you would die."

The words rang hollow through Bonnie's mind and she couldn't shift the memory of Annalise's pained expression at her words. The way she had looked at had Bonnie seemed beyond repair.

So Bonnie woke up in someone else’s bed. She resisted the urge to roll her eyes but mentally praised her insomnia. The blonde never got more than a few hours’ sleep a night and this night had proved to be no exception. She slid out of the stranger’s bed and scanned for her things on the dark bed room floor. Her partner of the night grumbled and shifted, his arm roamed out but settled in the warmth she left behind.

Bonnie released the breath she’d been holding when he stirred, she did not want to be caught escaping. That always led to complications and an awkward conversation. She’d said all she had wanted to this man the night before. She slipped her underwear back on before she grabbed her phone and illuminated the floor to retrieve her shirt and jacket. The items were crumpled in a way that screamed ‘walk-of-shame’ but she had time to clean herself up before work later. That was all that really mattered. 

Once she had left the Annalise’s office she had called Frank but his phone went straight to voicemail. That usually meant he was hooking up with someone that wasn’t his girlfriend. It also meant that he wasn’t a viable shoulder to cry on this evening which left the bar as her only solace.

It hadn’t taken Bonnie long to pick some sap up that had taken off his wedding ring the moment she slid onto the barstool next to him. What was it about vulnerable women on their own that drove men so wild? God, she wished Frank had been around. At least he was different.

But no matter who she ended up with, she'd always be back for Annalise the next morning.

It was business as usual at the Keating residence the following day, but Bonnie felt the shift in energy. Something had changed in the house that night and she had to fix it. The older woman had avoided the blonde’s gaze all day. Even the K5 had noticed something was amiss. “What did you do?” Asher asked her as privately as he could. He offered her a warm look, placed a supporting hand on her back.

Bonnie had shaken her head which meant she had no intention of discussing the topic with him. Asher, though curious, had taken the hint and left her alone. She’d talk to him if she wanted to. Or at least he’d hoped she would. They’d made enough of a bond that he trusted that.

Bonnie had almost been tempted to ask him why he thought she'd done something wrong. 

“What’s going on with those two?” Connor whispered when Asher returned to their little huddle. Discretion wasn’t really their strong suit. Bonnie shot them an icy glare before clearing her throat sharply. 

“If you spent half as much energy focusing on the task at hand that you spend on speculation and gossip then we’d be done here already!” She stormed out of the Keating living room to her desk.

 

\----------------------------------------------------------------------------

 

“I said come at me!” Annalise screamed, sitting in the metal chair like she was another witness in the stand, waiting to be grilled by them. The Keating five were silent as she watched them with dark eyes. Although she sat, and they stood, it was clear who carried the power here.

And that’s exactly what needed to change. Before they broke they needed to feel like they had power. And so that is what she was offering them; a chance to hold the keys to the kingdom, albeit temporarily. 

They each took turns tearing at her, ripping her piece by piece with their words. The kids were an angry pack of hyenas, dumping their insecurities and grievances on her like she was their counsellor or worse- their mother. But she’d asked for it. She wanted them to get it all off their chest to get their thoughts and anger out in the open. She was stronger than they were, and they needed this. She could take it.

Her eyes met Bonnie’s for a split second. She couldn’t quite read the expression in her blonde associates gaze. Pity? Fear? Anger? It was a rather complex mixture to decode. Annalise wondered if she dared to have a go. Would Bonnie take advantage of the opportunity and produce her claws here?

She doubted it. Bonnie was far too sentimental about their relationship to throw their dirty laundry in with the likes of the K5. That was probably for the best. Annalise wasn’t sure she could take it if Bonnie joined in with the vicious onslaught. 

Connor finished his piece, defeated and looking thoroughly exhausted. His exasperation was clear as he turned away from Annalise to resume his slouched position in the red arm chair. He looked as though the whole activity hadn’t helped him feel better in the slightest.

Good. She thought bitterly. Join the damn club.

Bonnie didn’t move. She really was the only one that wasn’t going to have a turn berating their boss and protector, if you could even still call her that.

“Bon?” Asher asked, tentatively, drawing the groups attention towards the blonde in the corner. Her cheeks burned as their eyes landed on her. A ghostly smirk traced Annalise’s face as she waited. Bonnie shook her head, folded her arms and turned around.

“Yeah she probably has nothing to say because you ruined her. Just like you’re trying to ruin us.” Conner rounded on Ms. Keating with renewed vigour, throwing his arms up to emphasise the fact.

“Speak nothing of what you don’t understand boy.” Annalise barked. Everyone jumped. Now the groups eyes were all on her. All but Bonnie’s.

“You’ve said your pieces.” Bonnie stated softly. “Now leave.” The blonde’s voice carried its usual terseness. She glared at the students, waiting for them to file out of the office. 

Connor picked up his bag, shoving his hands into his jacket pockets and swinging around to face Annalise one final time. “Don’t bother waiting up mom!” He gave her his best shit-eating grin before leaving. 

\-------------------------------------------------------------------------------

“Bonnie.” Annalise spoke. Her voice even and low. 

“Please don’t.” Bonnie blurted, eyes wide and frightful. 

“Bonnie...” Annalise repeated her name and took a step forward. The intensity in her gaze was too much. Bonnie had to look away. That passion and fire in her brown eyes ignited something within the blonde she never knew what to do with. This couldn’t be love. No matter what Isaac said. Her heart was twisting, contorting beneath her ribs. How was it possible to feel so much pain under someone else’s gaze?

Bonnie took a step backwards and Annalise took one forward. Bonnie felt trapped. An all too familiar feeling for her. 

“What am I to do with you?” 

“I’m not yours anymore.” 

“Was that what the class action was about? To show me you’re not mine anymore?” Annalise’s voice sharpened, just as it did in court because she launched her onslaught. Bonnie felt hot with embarrassment as it flushed through. She didn’t want to admit it but she’d never been able to lie to Annalise. 

“Yes.” She forces herself to respond but the blondes voice came out weak.

“You tried that with Sam, Asher and Frank did you not?”

Bonnie’s cheeks burned bright red but she didn’t respond.

“What made this different?”

“I wanted to hurt you.”

“You hurt all those people Bonnie!” Annalise shot back, baring her teeth angrily. Her voice was coarse. Annalise sounded as though she was berating a misbehaving child. “Innocent people!”  
Bonnie struggled to get the words out, anger and pain strangling her voice, “I. Hurt. You.”

Something painful flashed across Annalise’s face before she muted her expression and spoke. “I thought you were better than this.” Annalise sounded bored and disgusted. Like Bonnie wasn’t even worth her precious time right now.

Bonnie felt fire in her own chest this time. 

“Shouldn’t be a change for you to feel disappointed in me. You always have. You’ve never been happy with me!” Bonnie yelled throwing her arms up in frustration. “You gave me opportunities you never believed I could succeed in and then tore me down every step of the way.” Bonnie stepped forward, her eyes ablaze. Annalise opened her mouth to reply but Bonnie pushed forward with her tirade. 

“How could I ever be more than what you wanted me to be?! You wanted me like this. You wanted me subservient, at your knees begging to be in your good favour.” Bonnie kicked off her shoes and dropped to the ground, on her knees at Annalise’s feet. Angry tears streamed down her cheeks. 

“This is where you want me?” Neither of them was sure whether it was a statement or a question.

“You pretend this disgusts you but this is exactly where you want me.” That made Annalise falter. The site of her blonde assistant on the ground again. The last time she’d been there it had been too much for her. Annalise’d had to stand up and walk away from the younger woman.

It was that moment she’d fired her the first time. 

But it was when Annalise was on the backfoot that she knew exactly how to strike to kill.

“Oh pick yourself up.” Annalise dismissed, turning around. She couldn’t look at Bonnie like this. “Stop being so damn dramatic.”

“This may work on the men you throw yourself at but it doesn’t work for me.”

“You throw that line at me so often I’m starting to think you like imaging me with all these men.”

“That’s absurd.”

Bonnie was starting to think it wasn’t.

Oppressive silence descended on the two before she saw a familiar fire flash across Annalise’s gaze. It seemed she had formulated a new strategy to take Bonnie down with. Annalise always had hated to lose.

“You’re obsessed with me Bonnie. Do you scare yourself? Because you scare me.”

“I- you,” Bonnie fought with what she wanted to say. The thoughts twisted in her mind, she wanted to capitulate again. Bow her head and beg to be let into Annalise’s life again. 

“You’re jealous of Connor. You feel like I’ve replaced you.” Annalise added, smug and feeling the security of having the upper hand again. Bonnie jerked back as though she’d been physically struck. 

“You’re unbelievable.”


End file.
